Reflections on travel

I was looking through my pictures today of Croatia and Budapest--beautiful pictures. One of my favorites is of Gornji Grad, where I had lots of time to reflect, meditate, pray, and make meaningful observations and connections. The intricate iron gates, the dim lit candles next to the cobble stone road, the many passers-by from all of the world. Many friends later told me, "I'm so jealous you got to travel to Eastern Europe."
But, the truth is, that while I spent many beautiful moments and meaningful moments in Eastern Europe this summer, I also spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to actually make my time there meaningful--arguably, more time trying to figure out how to make it meaningful than actually partaking in meaningful activities. I spent a lot of time trying to make sense of why exactly I was in a foreign city with little connection to the culture. The truth is that the words "Eastern Europe" and "cathedrals" sound cooler than the actual act of being there; that the whole time I was there I was thinking about how I could find meaning in a place I had little understanding of, I spent many nights missing family, many days doing nothing, many Saturdays waking up at 11am, aimlessly traveling on the tram, searching for things to do on a tight budget and mustering up the guts to talk to people I would probably never see again. Although the experience seemed way cool, a lot of the "coolness" of it came after-wards, when I was home in Boston, away from Ilica street and away from Novi Zagreb, when I was able to make sense of how pushing myself in this way had made a difference--how it had left a tiny mark on my journey. My travel this summer was a seed and I am only now seeing some of it's fruit. I imagine I won't fully reap the "coolness" of this experience until I am able to compare it to future travel and future experiences.